diary

you found me! a dumping ground for all my more personal creative endeavours.

find here my photographic collages; which I call my ‘graphic diary entries’, art pieces that haven’t made the home page, & perhaps a written piece or two.

22/9/25

farewell to winter

a respite not met

but an absence that I needed most

3/9/25

air / earth / water & my venture into markets. I worked long and hard on my very first sticker sheet, put so much effort into each little illustration. so I spotlighted 6 of my favourites to share with my audience! I think they are soo cute. my little oddities.

9/8/25

got my hair & nails done fresh before my 28th birthday.

an expensive & rare ritual. it’s funny how much these outward routines can mean - how they make us feel, for something that sits at the surface.

I’m feeling so good, a palpable shift.

it’s more than keratin deep.

27/6/25

I was so stuck. yet there I was, finally… a change of s/pace at my residency in the beautiful magnetic island. BUT,

I was really sick

so much stress and trauma in my body, *screaming at me*, fatigued - it’s been a hard year.

“this was supposed to be my big break!!!! big things coming!!!” it felt like I was wasting my privilege & opportunity.

then FINALLY, something clicked. I was too demotivated and ‘lazy’ to do anything complex, so I utilised what I already had.

a mix of photography, editing, illustration swirled into this moody collage. somehow, this is the thing that broke me out of my art block.

‘my distinct voice’

I thought.. I’ve finally found it! a whole lifetime in the making.

poetry

  • In my wake between the darkness

    You breath in and out

    Unknowing and pure 

    Holding me close, my comfort

    When it’s dark I can’t wait to see you                   

    Your wit and effortless tone

    And your heart, golden like the light of the morning

    And the sun, that rises with you

    My favourite time of day - where you belong

  • Saturday afternoon, 

    My hangover has me moping on the couch for hours

    Staring deeply into the thick blanket that covers the sky, bright grey fog,

    I lay and wonder how the darkness of a winter afternoon can be so blinding 

    My eyes salty & falling prey to it’s sharp sting

    I can’t look away

    You come over to me, and wrap me up

    in your quiet affection.

    When I look at you,

    my insides turn warm

    like the sun came out from where it was hiding 

    & pierced holes in my skin. 

    My organs drenched in honey 

    as grey turns to gold

    it’s not as if you close the curtain,

    you shift the whole sky

  • The relics of my history 

    Before I existed in this body, I was with you

    And even when you go 

    They find their resting place within me

    To be re-birthed in our memory

  • To the one I love, resting within me

    I made it back home

    To the land of the morning

    Like islands, I’ve been adrift too long 

    So I am rebirthed, in salty bodies of water 

    Growing by the power of your sun 

love letters

2/5/22

I wish I was a cloud

Tilting my head towards the sky
Cause I wanted to float
I wish I was a cloud
So that I could disappear 

And only come out when I am ready
I leave you to enjoy the clear blue sky

And when I return
I’ll try not to rain 

If you saw me now, a storm would emerge
So unless you can brave it, and dance under me
Please give me time
To close up
And sit in the void with my heart locked away
Up in space where it’s black - beckoning me to join it 

You will only see me without my shadow 

But I have to ask, whether I am whole at all
If you cannot accept me for who I am

21/2/22

lemons

The gentle tide washes over moss covered stone,
as we sit in silence
Not the comfortable kind like we used to share
But the kind of silence that’s as cruel as you were yesterday

The kind that stings in knowing we both feel it,
sinking towards the pits of our bodies
Like the hangover I’ll have all week

Moss covered stone,
soft to the touch but jagged underneath
The uneven tide washes over it
Revealing itself to then hide away
It reminds me of you.

We’ve turned bitter,
the punch & acidity of unsweetened lemon juice,
Not the lemon glow we cherished as we swayed,
basking in the neon light - our adolescent innocence,

12 years gone

the unforgiving tide took you in

trilogy: from an ex(?) insomniac

23/11/21

I can’t be alone

I jolt awake and pray not to see 4am
On the clock 
The hush of night - a black mass
Every night for twenty eight days
I am so tired

The howling through the walls
The amber light I cannot sleep without
Ominous when I’m alone 

A stranger whispering something I don’t understand
His skin is blue, just like me
Are you really there beyond the veil?
or did my damaged mind fabricate you to keep me company?

I’m spinning, then tumbling 
Till I can’t move or speak 

There’s a livid drone ringing in my ears 
as I wait for the birds to greet me
And the pale blue to creep into my window

I rise - a wilting flower
But still,
With all the other flowers, I lean towards the sun 

Wishing that the dark hours would not return 

23/11/21

doubt

I have always lived in the grips of loving arms and shackles at once

Deeply dependent
With wavering trust in who I’ve become
The pattern flows from blood to water

Grateful, though secluded
Firm, yet helpless.

They mock my tears

The ones they never cry - wondering if they are broken
Yet I wonder the same
And recognise that we grieve alike

I felt myself slowly crawl out of the thick, wet soil
Bountiful and lush life surrounding me
Only to pull me in again and swallow
why so soon?

Wary, I drown because I cannot swim
The omnipotent ocean
Dousing me - doubting me
I pursue the same path

1/12/21

elegy

I look towards sheets of violet and green 
I take a deep breath 
And I feel free
A glowing orb of warm, loving energy 
I take in the fire through my body and release

Dust falling from our nails and our skin
We scream across the water, weightless to ascend 

I shut my eyes and only open once when I’m ready
A pleasure once lost.
Here I write an elegy to an era of disquiet 
Even with a heavy heart, I feel so much love

with my heavy head, I’ve found somewhere to rest 

Together we are safe

some time in 2025

untitled

when I close my eyes
the blur of his body is falling too fast before me

no one can catch him
I’m terrified of premonitions
and my own dreams

some time in 2024

it’s strange...(unfinished)

I have never felt my heart break 
the way I made it break on my own 

Everyone in the room is wrapped in colour
And I am the shadow in the corner
Disembodied and aloof